I'm a member of
Facebook ...and the other day, someone I didn't know requested me to be his friend. My first reaction is "Who is this person?" ...so I go to his profile to check him out. I realize we have three friends in common - all people I work with. So, I send him a message, saying I see we have mutual friends and ask him if we've ever met before. The reply is "Unfortunately, we haven't met in person but I don't think this should matter if we can communicate online. :)"
I think of myself pretty aware and up on today's social media experience... but I personally want to have some reason / connection to be "friends" rather than a simple, we're just going to talk online. I find my experience online as an extension of who I am and what I do offline... so it matters. And for those of you who don't know, you can set your profile so that people can message you without being friends. Why not get to know the person first...
Today's online world is full of niches, and I for one fit into many
niches, moving from one space to the next. And in each one, I have a
group of friends that I hang with. We hang out in these spaces because
we have a similar interest... but these larger spaces, like
MySpace or
Facebook is like the mall or park where you go to be seen, see others
and meet your friends and even get to know friends of friends.
However, in the offline world, I have instantaneous feedback to see you, your body language, your reactions... Here, I'm introduced by a friend or I find out you're a
friend of a friend. How are these senses transferring to an online
space?
But is being a "friend" online really a niche ...shouldn't there be more to it than just being a friend of a friend? Shouldn't I find out how well my friend knows this friend and what's the connection?
If I jump at the chance of allowing anyone to be my "friend", then how
will I ever really know anyone and will EVERYONE know all about me?
And if I did allow people who I've only met online to enter my space ...I
would really need to manage my online self much more closely than I
currently do.
I understand that technology has improved and I now have many privacy options available to me. I can share with...
- The entire Facebook network
- All the groups I belong to or pick and choose which group
- Just my "friends"
- My "friends" and "friends of my friends",
...As well as pick and choose and make my own private list of "friends
within my friends". A lot of options but do I have time to manage
this!? And how am I going to remember who's in and who's out!
If I take that stance, I really shouldn't be participating. But
overall, I love what these networks have offered to me ...a space to meet
those who have similar interests and learn new things. So to me, there
is no option... I'm going to be a participant in today's ever-increasing
information-driven world, and therefore I need to manage my public
self. I hope you'll join me too.
Click on the image thumbnail to explore all the options you have on just Facebook's social network. Take the time to make your own choices as to who, when and what you
want to disclose.
So if you're new to the network or you jumped in feet first and never
thought about it ...either way -- perhaps it's now time to think about it and explore your
options.
To learn more about privacy,
sign up to test the four Privacy Activities created by
NML and
Harvard's GoodPlay Project.
